Thursday, October 2, 2008
Because Tonight's Debate Isn't Going to be Exciting Enough
There are some excellent games you can play while watching/listening to the debate tonight.
The first is Palin Bingo!
The second was sent to me by my buddy Jaycee. It is the VP Debate Drinking Game-- if you google that phrase you'll come up with several variations. Here's the one I received:
Tonight's debate is (like America's future) all about reduced expectations. If Sarah Palin manages to remember what office she's running for, she will have managed expectations. If Joe Biden manages to make it through the night without calling Gwen Ifill a "gorgeous negress," he will have beaten his debilitating gaffe addiction. But what about the other 90 minutes of bullshit? Let's make it fun — or hazy, at least — by drinking away the terror.
Take a drink of wine or beer when the following occurs:
PALIN evades a question by mentioning state rights.
BIDEN says he takes the train home every day.
PALIN fills time by listing all her kids, by their ridiculous names.
BIDEN talks about Scranton.
PALIN blames Iraq for 9/11.
BIDEN blames McCain for 9/11.
PALIN says "like" as a White Trash discourse particle or interjection.
BIDEN audibly laughs at Palin.
PALIN stares blankly when she can't answer a question.
BIDEN makes a sarcastic joke that goes right over Palin's head, along with about half the viewers.
PALIN says anything comically idiotic about Russia or Canada.
LIGHTNING BONUS ROUND:
The following situations call for One (1) Shot of Liquor:
PALIN doesn't know what FDIC or SEC stand for.
BIDEN admits to plagiarizing the Constitution.
PALIN admits to dealing meth.
BIDEN references Palin's stump speech insult — where she claims she's been hearing about Biden's Senate speeches since she was in second grade — by saying there's no evidence Sarah Palin ever made it to second grade.
GWEN IFILL asks Sarah Palin about incestuous rape.
PALIN insults Biden for having hair plugs.
BIDEN calls her "another tanning booth whore, and I've know a few."
PALIN says "lipstick" in any context.
Finally: Three shots and throw the glass at the TV if:
BIDEN calls palin a "hockey pig."
PALIN pulls off her pantsuit to reveal a confederate-flag one-piece bathing suit, and she looks fat, and the audience boos.
Posted by Spike Gillespie at 2:37 PM